In Review

Happy New Year everyone!! I decided I'd share my joys and sorrows of 2009 with the world. Overall, 2009 has been an exciting year FULL of firsts!

On January 8th, 2009, Judah Avery Johnson was welcomed into the world and our lives changed forever. We were so anxious to meet Judah and the roller coaster of emotions began for me. I was elated, nervous, scared, and happy. The overwhelming feeling of being a mother and the responsibility that hung over me was almost more than I could bare! Honestly, these feelings coupled with my hormones probably made it more that it really was, but I, never-the-less, was overwhelmed. Justin was so patient and seemed to calm me down by just being there.

The whole nursing thing was a bit much for me. I felt so secluded and strapped down. I was glad Judah was eating and getting the nutrition that breast milk had to offer, but again, it was overwhelmingly lonely to me. I would just cry when I fed him. I finally realized that I was in a bit of a depression. I would just cry and cry. I wasn't happy and felt like a failure as a mother. ALL of which were lies the devil was feeding me. I went to my Dr. and she suggested I go on some anti-depressant pills and see someone about my feelings. I took her prescription, but never filled it. I decided that God was more than enough to cure me. I didn't want to become so dependant on a drug for my happiness. I finally came through it, with MUCH prayer, when Judah was about 6 or 7 months old. I began to feel like myself and my baby weight (which was also a source of depression) began to come off as well.

Since that time, things have been great! Judah is flourishing, learning and becoming so independent, and strong-willed! (I wonder who he gets that from? lol) I am loving spending time with him now as he jabbers complete non-sense, claps for me when I sing to him, and dances anytime he hears music. He's walking everywhere and is looking quite grown up. He loves to eat and is a great sleeper. He's on quite a fabulous routine and is so active (all boy!). Although this "year in review" revolves around Judah, he's the biggest thing to happen to us this year. 2009 has revolved around him and I welcome the changes that will take place in him through the years.